BroBible piece stereotypes Loyola women poorly and inaccurately
Paulina Stachnik
Issue date: 2/2/10 Section: Opinion
It's not everyday that you cause your professor to lose her appetite (let's hope so, at least) but that's exactly what I did last week when I forwarded Dr. Dale Snow, Acting Chair of Loyola's Philosophy Department and the woman who mentored me in my first steps towards understanding the importance of feminism, an article I'm sure many of you have seen. Permeating the Facebook statues and updates over the last couple of days, a BroBible, an "observation" piece by "Waffles McButter" and his soggy-minded cohorts, has been spreading its virulently deluded notes on Loyola's female population.
If that doesn't clue you in on the credibility of these self-appointed prowlers (read: creeps), let's see what they actually have to say about the meat-I mean women-in question. To start: the ratings. Let's pat ourselves on the backs, girls, we score above-average in almost every category; we're "gorgeous and rich" and-look at that!-a B+ in the "Intelligence" category! On top of that, our "Maintenance" ranking is a solid B, so throw a few drinks our way (B+ in "Alcohol Consumption") and we'll be all over you (Willingness to [ahem]: B+). And don't worry about the tab, boys, we'll foot the bill-Daddy's Bank Roll earned us a shiny A+. Our blind generosity is eloquently reiterated by one of Pancake's sources, "The bar scene can get a bit expensive but everyone from Loyola is rich, so we manage." Glad we could help-would you like a foot massage with that gin and tonic?
On top of that, we're morally chaste (or at least make a good stab at pretending), spending our Saturday nights losing our clothes and inhibitions on the streets of Baltimore only to regain some semblance of purity on Sunday morning. "This is why the girls you might see at Church are the same girls who were running wild just hours beforehand. Upon waking up the next morning, Loyola chicks will rely heavily on confession to absolve them of their sins." Ahh, that explains why mass was so well-attended this morning! Thank you so much for clearing that up, Mr. McButter.
If that doesn't clue you in on the credibility of these self-appointed prowlers (read: creeps), let's see what they actually have to say about the meat-I mean women-in question. To start: the ratings. Let's pat ourselves on the backs, girls, we score above-average in almost every category; we're "gorgeous and rich" and-look at that!-a B+ in the "Intelligence" category! On top of that, our "Maintenance" ranking is a solid B, so throw a few drinks our way (B+ in "Alcohol Consumption") and we'll be all over you (Willingness to [ahem]: B+). And don't worry about the tab, boys, we'll foot the bill-Daddy's Bank Roll earned us a shiny A+. Our blind generosity is eloquently reiterated by one of Pancake's sources, "The bar scene can get a bit expensive but everyone from Loyola is rich, so we manage." Glad we could help-would you like a foot massage with that gin and tonic?
On top of that, we're morally chaste (or at least make a good stab at pretending), spending our Saturday nights losing our clothes and inhibitions on the streets of Baltimore only to regain some semblance of purity on Sunday morning. "This is why the girls you might see at Church are the same girls who were running wild just hours beforehand. Upon waking up the next morning, Loyola chicks will rely heavily on confession to absolve them of their sins." Ahh, that explains why mass was so well-attended this morning! Thank you so much for clearing that up, Mr. McButter.
Viewing Comments 1 - 7 of 7
Waffles McButter
posted 2/02/10 @ 9:12 AM EST
FIRST!!!
Adam
posted 2/02/10 @ 9:35 AM EST
As a Jewish male, I have a big problem with feminazis.
Maslow
posted 2/02/10 @ 10:22 AM EST
Let me get this straight, you were taking advice about modern living and coping with the bullsh*t people write on the internet about male/female college life from *clergy*--someone with whom you share no family relation but still call Father?!
You are invalidated. (Continued…)
Learn to take a joke
posted 2/12/10 @ 4:33 PM EST
Wow, this article was obviously a joke, as is the entire site. I agree with maslow, get off your high horse.
Dookert
posted 2/13/10 @ 1:48 AM EST
Jesus, learn how to write girl. Run-on sentences, screwy punctuation, and a ridiculous pension for using hyphens. Article was tongue and cheek. Get the sand out of your vagina and relax. (Continued…)
John
posted 2/19/10 @ 10:36 AM EST
Maslow - Your criticism of Catholicism is likewise invalidated by the fact that you quietly let your parents pay for you to go to a Catholic school. You'd probably be easier to take seriously if you drop out now and go to a state school. (Continued…)
Maslow
posted 3/18/10 @ 9:06 PM EST
John--I actually attended Johns Hopkins, this other school near Loyola. And I self-financed it. Peace.
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